Two weeks ago, the toe of shoe caught the ground, causing me to plantar flex my foot and rupture my calf.
Snap!
In that instant, all my plans for the coming months changed.
As I sat on my floor, my calf throbbing, two thoughts entered my mind: I either “cured” the muscle tightness I had been experiencing, or I crippled my calf.
I pulled myself up, knowing it was likely the latter. I would have to cancel my trip to Iceland in 10 days.
The assessment in the ER an hour later confirmed it. I had most likely torn my calf. The nurses fastened a splint to my leg and handed me crutches.
Sure, it would be disappointing to cancel my trip. However, part of me felt a sense of relief. I had considered postponing my trip anyway because of my Achilles injury. It is unlikely I would have completed the Reykjavík Marathon.
I realized I had been pressuring myself to complete a marathon on all seven continents. I still have three more to go.
Why the sense of urgency?
When I examined my thoughts, I heard:
Finish the marathons while you are relatively young. Running only gets harder as you age.
Your parents died young. You don’t know how much time you really have.
Aha!
I don’t plan on dying anytime soon, but it’s hard to ignore that my father, my stepfather, and my mother all died with no warning.
Because of this, I have lived my life with exigency. Do everything I desire while I still can.
This most recent injury has prompted me to reconsider my thinking. In some ways, it’s good to live like there is no tomorrow and not to waste precious time. On the other hand, I could benefit from fully healing from my injuries before I dive into more marathons.
I could adopt a more centered approach.
Live for today and—most likely—many tomorrows.
Any setback provides us with an opportunity to be mentally flexible, to generate new solutions to problems.
At this point, I am still awaiting an MRI for my doctor to determine the severity of my injuries. I have no idea when I will run, hike, and bike again. Perhaps this latest impediment will lead to a way to resolve the injuries that have plagued me the last three years.
At least now I am off my crutches. I said I walk like an old lady, except three old ladies passed me on the trail yesterday.
As I await my prognosis, I am using this time to focus on writing and speaking. One day, of course, I will finish my marathons!
